Firstly you need to accept Jesus as Lord and Master of your life - you cannot serve two masters, self and Jesus. Jesus does not have a relationship with sinners, He loves them and cares for them but if they do not turn away from sin abruptly and obey Him they will not be led by Him. He leads His sheep.
You need to make a firm decision to follow Jesus, which means you turn away from sin and serving yourself and accept Jesus as your Master. Go on your knees and cry out to Him for forgiveness of your past sins and ask Him to accept you as a child of God. Humble yourself before Him and cry out loud until you know that you have connected with Jesus. If you are serious He will come to you quickly and give you peace and joy like you never experienced.
You will experience the presence of Jesus in and around you. You then need to stay with Him, pray all the time all day, stop sinning, be holy. Be baptized in water for forgiveness of your sins and He will give you His Holy Spirit to be in you to guide you. You will hear His voice in you.
Seek Him with all your heart and you will find Him.
